That’s Cool, but How Many People Have You Really Slept With?

A Seattle Washington & Sowhatiff Jenkins Episode

The Plaintiff – Seattle Washington

People of the internet, visitors of the blog.  I’m here today to bring to your attention some questionable practices from a company we interact with all the time.  Everyday they’re decreasing numbers, intimidating witnesses and falsifying evidence all to keep their syndicate running perfectly. Who am I talking about? Women.  They’re more devious than Enron, your local bookie and Dick Cheney combined.  Low or high, men seem to always have a clear count of who’ve they slept with (not counting those b*tch ass dudes who inflate).  Some dudes even have a resume complete with references, just in case you want to check their qualifications.  We take pride in our work.  But when you ask a woman how many people (not just dudes, we’re in a new era now) she’s slept with, things get fuzzier than Cleopatra Jones’s afro in high humidity.

Why is that?  Hmm…  Well, we here at Three Ways have heard all types of crazy ass excuses reasons why that may be.  Exhibit A – I was vulnerable.  I don’t really remember it.  I was sleeping.  It was just the tip.  He was whack so it doesn’t count, etc. etc.  So, I’ll ask you a question ladies.  If I walk into the movies, through the doors, sit down with my popcorn, watch the opening credits and 1/2 way through the movie realize it’s whack – wasn’t I still in that movie theater?  I can’t just erase that joint from my memory, I’ve got the condom wrapper ripped up ticket in my pocket to remind me.

I appeal to the courts better judgment and say that this inaccurate counting needs to stop now.  If you want us to be honest with you, you’ve got to keep it real yourselves.  I know there are some chicks all men would love to forget about – shudder but hey, it happened so we have to own up to it.  If we could use Hennessey as a reason to disregard certain dubious females, our numbers would surely plummet.  But we can’t.  And we probably wouldn’t.  Because it’s been ingrained in us since kindergarten that 1+1 = 2.  So if I kiss shorty by the swings, that’s 1, and her friend will surely make 2.

Thank you.

Seattle – I Watched A Lot of Law & Order With My Grandma – Washington


The Defendant – Sowhatiff? Jenkins

As Counselor “He still watches TV with Grandma, how cute” Washington shrewdly notes, it is true: Women do in fact alter our numbers depending on the audience we are catering to.  And while this may seem “devious,” I ask that you consider the position that men, and society at large has put us in, thus leading us to this type of behavior. I’m not ducking reality here, but I ask that you reflect on the circumstances thereof.

Let’s start with language.  Words like “loose,” “ho(e)”, “skeez”, “bus down”, and “scallywag”, are a few ways to refer to a woman with a “high” number of sexual partners.  I put “high” in quotes because this determination varies depending on who you talk to.  The point:  women get judged for having more than x number of partners during y amount of years.  We are supposed to keep it right and tight.  A certain number of sex partners tends to lead people to believe a woman has low morals and/or standards, when reality probably indicates just the opposite.  For men, another notch on the ol’ belt is note worthy and elicits praise and ego stroking (pause). Women though, aren’t praised.  We are held to self imposed standards that are informed by societal (and man driven) expectations.

Men, don’t act like this behavior is merely a product of our innate female tendencies.  I have had many conversations with men who prefer a woman with “low numbers.”  Yep, that is correct.  Low numbers.  A perpetuation of the very falsities they wish to avoid.   In a situation when a woman knows of this value, she may fib, and drop her number a little when the question comes up.  Who is hurt by this?  Not the man for sure, because he’s happy because his girl is ::insert whatever value men place on this here::.  I would argue, that woman suffers a little here, because she feels like she has to deny parts of her true self to gain acceptance.  Perception is reality folks.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I ask that you try this test.  Think about the word “ho(e)”.  Does it mean “a woman having lots of “meaningless” sex with a “high” number of men”? If you answered, yes, you have proven my point.

In closing I will say this: yes we fib about our numbers sometimes.  But who’s fault is this?  Arguably, not ours.  As such, I propose a solution: don’t ask, don’t tell.  Everybody wins.

Good day.

Sowhatiff? “Why do you want to know my numbers anyway” Jenkins



And at this point, we shall let you deliberate…  Let us know, what’s the verdict people?


47 responses to “That’s Cool, but How Many People Have You Really Slept With?

  1. Your numbers are your numbers. If you got it in, be proud of it and put it in the past when you’re ready to settle down. I think that goes for both men and women. A hoe is someone who gets paid for sex. It can be cash, it can be free dinner, it can be getting your rent and car note paid, whatever. If you’re having sex with someone just so they’ll give you something tangible, it makes you a hoe. Shoot, I think we’ve all done a little hoe-in at some point in our lives. Any dude who hasn’t laid the pipe for some good home cooking probably just lacks the skillset. But I digress, back to the numbers. If you’re at the point in a relationship where you’re asking about numbers, you should be at the point where truth matters. If you were a freak back in the day, better get it out in the open. Things like that have a funny way of hoppin’ out the closet…

  2. I concur whole hearted with you Ironman! I cannot lie, I have been shocked at times at the number I hear from women. However, I do not mind a “high” number simple because I appreciate the honesty. If I am asking you your number of partners, we are probably at a point that I can deal with it (even if its a staggering figure). I get more upset to be lied to, only to have some dude come at me from the left wing talking how the whole block hit the spot before.

    Honesty is the best policy in this aspect of sex!

  3. Whooooooooooooooa! First let me say, Sowahtiff & Seattle, I think you both did a great job of expressing your respective points of view.

    The real issue here is not lying about your number but the greater picture of the double standard of “the number.” I have never asked a man what his magic number is, I don’t care…it is irrelevant to what kind of man he is or will be towards me. (I have asked health related questions i.e. have you ever had an STD?) This is because for a man whether the number is 1 or 100 it really doesn’t matter. People assume men have “bagged” a gazillion chicks either way. For women, it is never that simple. EVERY man wants to be the ONLY man, so no answer to the number question is ever okay. If I say 2 people he won’t believe me (and make up his own number anyway) if I say 20 people he will be out.

    As a result of this inescapable double standard, women are persuaded, maybe even forced, to deflate the number. Men say they want honesty but really who is going to marry the girl who slept with the whole insert whatever organization you like (football team, fraternity, click of homeboys) and is proud of it because she will tell any and everybody who asks?

    Men are praised for flaunting and increasing their numbers while women are shamed for having ANY number at all as long as this is the standard, women will deflate and men will inflate. (Every man claims he doesn’t lie on his _ _ _ _ but every man has embellished a story here or there)

    Since this is the reality we live in, I have to say the number, is irrelevant…unless there is someone you MUST admit to, (homeboy, frat brother, cousin, etc. etc. etc.) other than that you men need to let it go 😉

  4. Very well put InsomniaPoet. I completely agree.

    This conversation is highly awkward, uncomfortable and in my opinion completely irrelevant to a current relationship. Health issues are HIGHLY relevant. However, as a woman I can say I don’t want to know your number because then I wonder who each of them were, if they are a threat, etc. It just opens a whole bunch of unnecessary potential jealously, insecurity, and drama.

    And, on the flip side…being asked a # (which I’ve only had happen twice, one from a complete stranger and another from a guy I was dating) I feel is inappropriate. Having a talk about past relationships…maybe…but having a talk about every sexual encounter is just not necessary. It’s my own business. Therefore my answer to the question was “why do you want to know?” … not because I am ashamed or feel my # is too high, but I think the conversation should be around relationship maturity (have you had serious relationship or many flings, etc), sexual health (if you had a wild stage where you ran through x # of ppl, have you been tested, should you be tested, etc), and what is the REAL reason for wanting to know an exact # (insecurity in the relationship, curiousity, etc)

    That’s just my opinion…take it for what it’s worth.

  5. Seattle Washington

    I can see what you young ladies are saying. However, if the dude wants to know the number, shouldn’t you be honest?

    “…yes we fib about our numbers sometimes. But who’s fault is this? Arguably, not ours.”

    Furthermore, it’s not right to blame someone or something else for your dishonesty. (Although the fairer gender is known to shift blame instead of taking responsibility, but that’s another entry…) If dude asks, hit em with the number. I have a policy that I let be known from the beginning – if I ask, it means I want to know the truth. If I don’t ask, I don’t want to know. I know many dudes that abide by the same regulations.

    Plus, if dude couldn’t handle your number, then he probably wasn’t the one for you. No need to lie about it. As Ironman mentioned, skeletons usually have a way of making their way out of the closet.

  6. Seattle, I agree a woman should be honest. But let me ask you this..what is the bottom line to why you want to know a specific #?

    Wouldn’t you just take that # and judge her for it? Doesn’t it just turn into a very long, drawn out convo explaining why the number is low, or high. Females get defensive when asked b/c generally there isn’t a lot of acceptance either way.

  7. First off to Slim and Seattle Happy Black Man’s Appreciation Day! Secondly numbers don’t matter, I’m always honest about mine…And the men I’ve been honest to usually end up being in a relationship with me because I’ve been honest…I’m just saying sit it out there, if someone loves you it won’t make them leave.

  8. The reason for knowing the number varies from dude to dude. I’ve adopted the “don’t ask. don’t tell. just assume based on personality, age and liberalness” policy. Quite honestly, if I suspect the number is high according to my standards, the person is re-categorized to the “non-wifey, but very cool person” category. It’s not an insult, it’s just my preference. I don’t wanna be out and about with shorty, and we bump into dudes that used to thump. That sh*t is mad awkward. I also don’t want to end up at some re-union gathering with her and people are looking at me and laughing because she was some team, clique, or frat’s favorite girl. I don’t think many people want to buy a car that’s had too many owners, and even that is relative to the individual. Double Standard. I know. Sorry.

  9. Seattle Washington

    It’s not even that the car has had too many owners Slim. Too many dudes have taken joy rides and now the shocks are all messed up. I’ve seen it too many times… (jokes?)

    Moving on, the number convo is always awkward. Steph – I don’t judge, I may ask a few questions and you can feel free to ask away at my list. I accept you for who you are. Like I said before, this is a safe place. (lights some scented candles) No need to get defensive. And Slim is right, once I make some key observations I can probably deduce what the numbers are like anyway. Personally, I just rather know up front what I’m working with.

    I’d like to pose another question to the ladies – On the flip side, do you want to know your dude’s number? Also, do you want to know who he’s slept with (one of your home girl’s or sorority sisters)? Because we can talk about the numbers without talking about who and we can talk about who without talking about the numbers.

  10. My definition of a hoe is has less to do with the actual number of people that you have had sex with and more to do with the way you went about having said sexual encounters. A hoe is the jawn that you call up at 3am after every other option has failed, beat it up with total disregard for them, then kick her owt and make her walk home by herself at 5am (I know I was once a mean, evil person). I know girls with high numbers that arent considered hoes mostly b/c they’re the ones using the men for the peter.

    Secondly, I have no problem with a girl’s numbers, barring that number is something astronomical, as long as I don’t know any of the dudes. By “know” I mean, I don’t want them to be close enough to me that I would invite them out for a beer (they might slip up and say something stupid).

    Insomnia I agree with you when you said “(Every man claims he doesn’t lie on his _ _ _ _ but every man has embellished a story here or there) “. I aint gonna lie, I may have said I knocked it out the park when I really hit a blooper to left field.

    I don’t think the double standard is created by men. I think women create it. It’s a nutty concept but peep game. Men will call a jawn a hoe but that won’t stop him from talking to said hoe if he got the chance and in some cases he might even wife up the jawn. Furthermore, its women who after another woman has been called a hoe will go gossipping “You know girl, I heard Shashashalicious slept with you know who”.

    In the voice of Porky Pig, “That’s all folks”

  11. Seattle Washington

    Oh and yeah! Black Man Appreciation Day. Thanks Jaclynn. So does my credit score rise and taxi cabs immediately stop in front of me? Do I get some afternoon delight? Maybe even get a beef patty and some cocoa bread with a pineapple soda?

    … what exactly happens today?

  12. “I aint gonna lie, I may have said I knocked it out the park when I really hit a blooper to left field.”

    I just laughed out loud in my office. Now people think I’m happy to be here when I’m really not.

  13. Seattle, I think the who matters more than the how many. I have never asked a man his number but I have asked about specific chicks. Did you sleep with her, or I heard you dated so and so what’s the story there? I don’t care if my guy slept with a whole clique of chicks I don’t know but I do care if he slept with one chick I talk to or see regularly.

    To clarify, I have never lied about my number, I was asked once in college by a serious bf and told him the truth. He didn’t believe it and that was the beginning of the end for us. LOL. But I have a question, exactly how many is too much. For the guys is there a number that a woman could tell you where the circumstances are irrelevant? And if so, what is that number?

  14. First of all i dont know how Men are “shocked” at womens high #’s when Men’s numbers are high also and the people that men are having sex with are women. I feel that putting women in categories as “non wifey” material because of their high #’s. I find it hilarious because having high #’s doesn’t mean anything. A woman’s past is her past and if a women is treating you right, that is someone you can trust and their past should not matter. Also if this particular person has an std or has aids than for someone to put them in their “non wifey” category is understandable and makes more sense. I think its important for both men and women to have low numbers because having high numbers is still a risk of having some type of std one out of four people has hpv or some type of std.

  15. Seattle Washington

    Insomnia Poet, I couldn’t really tell you a standard number that all Men have agreed upon for whorishness. I’ll be sure to bring it up at the next Man Conclave though.

    This one “great” girl I know informed me of a guideline to the numbers game. This is something her and her girls abided by (somewhat):

    The standard is two folks for every year you’re not in a relationship from the time you lost your virginity.

    What do y’all think about that?

  16. I think that makes sense. Roughly 3 months apart, you put the goods to work to make sure they don’t get rusty. It’s like an ear piercing; sure you may not wear earrings all the time, but every so often you have to push one through to make sure the hole doesn’t close up. If it closes up, then you have to go through the pain and hassle of piercing it again; the whole situation becomes dramatic and overly complicated for no reason.

    The only rules I’d implement are
    1.) be safe.
    2.) don’t work backwards; no repeats, it’s bad for business.
    3.) NO PLAYING CATCH UP: If you were in a relationship for 2 years, that doesn’t mean you saved up 4 free passes so you can rock out with your c*ck out.
    4.) they have to be cute, and of a decent standard, because they will become part of the portfolio…and who doesn’t want an impressive portfolio?

    Seattle, that girl, is absolutely genius. Pass the message along to her for me. Thanks!

  17. I kinda like that formula. However, if 1 of the 4 guys from a two year period is a member of my frat, she is instantly off limits. Don’t even wanna go that route for many an obvious

  18. haha @ the man conclave… but seriously if there is no agreed upon number, make it a personal question. Formulas aside, what is your cut off number fellas? What number can a girl tell you that no matter how she explains it, she is no longer in the running for wifey?

  19. Seattle, I apologize. I wasn’t meaning to come off definsive. I probably shouldn’t have posted before my coffee this morning, haha.

    I was just playing devil’s advocate :o)

  20. Vanessa aka Miss V

    This whole numbers thing is a touchy issue…

    A huge part of me wants to know my boo’s numbers, but, I don’t ask. I figure that as long as I know his health status, and that we are protected during intimate relations, I’m cool. Honestly, I feel like if my boo told me his number and I thought it was high, it would change my whole view on him, and possibly make me want to end our intimate relations. So, I can’t be mad at dudes who cringe/run away when a woman shares her honest (read: high) numbers.

    I must admit, though, I’m totally comfortable with sharing my number, probably because I can count on one hand how many partners I’ve had. Maybe if I needed both hands and both feet to count how many dudes I creeped with, I’d be more inclined to lie…. sorry.

  21. If I answer that, I may anger some women that know who I am in real life. But for the sake of furthering blog discussion, I shall play. Now age is also a factor. For the purpose of this question. Let’s take a person that is ohhh, let’s say 23 years old and a college graduate of any 2 or 4 year institution…

    She meets all other criteria, including an understanding of sports and an appreciation of my pursuits outside of work…

    I’d have to say that the cut off number would be….

    6 7

    By the way, if she has checked a lot of dudes microphones, a la Karrine Steffans, as a way to keep up her vaginal integrity, I will decrease the acceptable number of partners to like 3. As a matter a fact, if she’s checked over 2 mics more than her number of sexual partners, it’s a wrap because she tried to cheat the system. That’s a double penetration penalty.

  22. RightCoastLexSteele

    Sorry I’m late.

    Muy interesante. Now here’s the thing. If your man wants to know your numbers and he’s willing to leave you if it’s too high, that’s really his own insecurity. That being said, if you’ve boinked everyone on my block or at my job, then I probably just wouldnt holla because I would have to kick someone’s ass everyday for making a smart comment. I’ve said this a previous post, all you fellas that want a freak in the sheets need to realize that they’re isnt a training program or dvd that shows these ladies how to rock your world. It takes practice (PRACTICE? We talkin bout practice?) If I really like you and you slept with 50 dudes, you know what, call em up and tell them that number 51 was the SHIT. As odd as it sounds, dudes definitely dont want to be a stat or a notch on your bedpost, so when most dudes ask they want to know if they can trust you. I can respect whatever answer you give, just dont lie to me.

    And for the record, I would marry Superhead. Why?? HELLO!!! Her name is SUPERHEAD. SUPERHEAD. SUPER FREAKIN HEAD. Mr. Marcus couldnt tame it, but you know Lex can…
    Come feel the STEELE!

  23. Well, as far as numbers go, I would agree with Slim with 7 is the cutoff for serious relationship contenders. 8 partners…I’d have to see what the circumstances were. Acceptance of 9 would depend on how fine she was. 10 or more partners, I know she’s a flipper…and once a jump down, ALWAYS a JD.

    With Slim mentioning chicks microphone checking, I also think that chicks might take it back door to save the vaginal integrity too. Those back door partners would count toward the total number as well. No ways around it…ESPECIALLY using the backdoor.

    I think with this whole numbers discussion, women are expected to have lower numbers because the use of dildos, vibrators, etc. is accepted. I don’t think sex toys are accepted for guys to use like it is with women sex toys. How many dudes you know have c*ck rings, blow-up dolls, or The Vagina Flashlight? (Google search images if you’re not familiar) If you disagree with this thought, why do girls have sex toy parties? It’s accepted to use other methods for girls, but dudes don’t throw sex toy parties. I think if the girl isn’t in a serious relationship, its accepted and maybe expected for her to get a dildo or The Rabbit and get to work.

  24. “If I really like you and you slept with 50 dudes, you know what, call em up and tell them that number 51 was the SHIT.”

    LMAO. I appreciate and respect this response. I agree that an issue with the number is a reflection of one’s own insecurity. I’m not gon scroll up to see who said it first, but I’m with the “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy. I don’t want to know yours, and you really don’t want to know mine. I’m confident that there are more efficient (and effective) ways to determine how honest and trustworthy I am.

  25. 7 wow, okay, in the circle I run with that is mighty low, Lawd…
    From personal experience I would say it depends on the person… When your young and free spirited, as long as your safe why should it count against you. I mean really if a chick said 45 you have rights to be like, baby take my hand and lets go to the doctor to make sure your straight. After the test is said and done ,what is your excuse, insecurity??? Come on how many of you haven’t had more than 5, if you didn’t you thought about it and considered it. I am pretty picky and I pushed past the 7 digit a few years ago….

  26. “If your man wants to know your numbers and he’s willing to leave you if it’s too high, that’s really his own insecurity.”

    Puh-f*ckin-lease. That’s the most absurd sh*t I ever heard. You can tell cuz I had to use 2 asterisks in 2 sentences. It’s got nothing to do with insecurity. I, or any man for that matter, that has his stuff together can exercise discretion in relationships in whatever way we .please just has a high quality woman can Had the girl actually had sex with a popular celebrity or popular porn star and I put her into the no-go category (Which I would do), then THAT would be insecurity. lol.

    Like I said earlier, I don’t ask and I just kinda assume based on the type of person at this point in my life. I call a jump a jump, a conservative chick a conservative chick, and a liberal but respectable a liberal but respectable. I know everybody got needs, and no sexually active and single woman wants to endure vitamin D deficiency for too long. That whole, “that was during college or high school when I was outta control” excuse is not for me.

    Not to sound cliche, but Get The F*ck Outta Here Wit That Sh*t. lol.

  27. LMAO @ slim!!!

    Nevertheless, I would prefer a woman who has a higher number who is a monster in the bedroom than one who was turned out by one dude…Cuz if dude is still hanging around and shit goes wrong, guess who she’s probably running too….

    But, word, I’m definitely with RightCoast on that
    Superhead tip….Keep me happy for life!!!

  28. @Seattle-I’m just seeing your comment…

    Well I guess chicken wings, mangoes, lemonade, Ketel One on the rocks, massages…in other words general catering.

    Slippers, Dinner, Dessert and so Much More…Any questions?

  29. Seattle Washington

    you all made me miss my train stop with all these comments. cot damn…

    I agree with Slim, it’s less about insecurity, more about standards. some dudes wouldn’t mind being 51, other dudes just want to be in the one digit area. can’t blame ’em, it’s just want they want. myself? hung jury for now. just keep me happy, the rest will sort itself out…

    on another note, why aren’t all of you celebrating Black Man Appreciation Day? a few e-cards would’ve been nice. geezus, take after Jaclynn. she gets it poppin…

  30. Seattle…way to bring it back…

    shouldn’t it always about being happy w/ someone? Going back to a comment I made on another blog – when you have chemistry w/ someone, or you’re drawn to them, conversation is good, lots of other “check points” on the list of must have’s are there…is it really a major deal breaker if they are at one number above what is generally acceptable?

    Happy Belated Black Man Appreciation day! :o)

  31. No one should ever lie about their #, regardless if they’re a male or female. With that being said, if someone is worried about what connotations might be associated with them upon truthfully answering this kind of question, rather than lie, they should just not say anything.

    Not everyone is necessarily privy to that kind of information. And if its your fiance or husband we’re talking about, you should feel comfortable enough that they’ll appreciate you as is, instead of lying to him/her and yourself.

  32. RightCoastLexSteele

    “when you have chemistry w/ someone, or you’re drawn to them, conversation is good, lots of other “check points” on the list of must have’s are there…is it really a major deal breaker if they are at one number above what is generally acceptable?”

    I think simply put that what I am trying to express. While we do deal with double standards on a daily basis and men are encouraged to lay pipe freely and frequently, wouldnt you be pissed if you met the girl of your dreams and she shut YOU down because she somehow got wind of your number and was turned off? The Americans have a saying about stones and glass houses, not sure how it goes though. But seriously, with all the damage I’ve done, if I meet someone and we got a good vibe, I could care less what her number is, and I dont even care to know. But I’m not going to freak out 2 years into the relationship if I do find out. Yes, you have standards, but at the end of the day, you know what you have on your hands. If you didnt worry about her jumpoff ability before, why should her number change things? And you know what, if she does turn out to be a jump, and she cheats, just dust your shoulders off pimpin, because there are a million her’s and one YOU (all my solo’s stand up!). If your ish was tight, and I’m not just talking about the pipe game, if you did everything in your power to make this girl happy and treated her like the one and she still wanna jump, I will bet my Charles Schwab account (that’s right, not Lehman’s) that she’ll be back. She’ll know that she messed up big time. And it’s cool, because you’ll have moved on and it will be a huge ego stroke and everybody likes a good ego stroke. (and mouth hugs…love mouth hugs)

    Superhead is rich and gives great head. Probably not everything you need to make you happy, but that is a hell of a start!

  33. What you don’t know will never hurt you. Why ask a question to get an answer that will put things in your mind.
    That question is sometimes based maybe on insecurity or guilt of the person asking. If I’m with a woman I’m not going to ask, because at the end of the day you can’t change that number.

  34. I have to agree with Slim. It has nothing to do with my sexual insecurity. For men this issue is about getting a fair trade for my emotions. I need a girl with low number so I know that I haven’t been fooled into loving a jump.

    When things start to get serious for a couple that is when they start sharing things that are exclusive. My penis isn’t exclusive or unique to a girl I have feelings for in anyway. It has been shared by nice girls, sluts, Asians, hood rats, church girls, fat ones, strippers, and some girls who I was suspicious of being burnt (but I beat anyway and just kept my boxers on for extra protection). Sex isn’t what is special for a man to only share with a girl he wants to build with. His feelings and reputation are distinctive to a relationship. I guy wants to know that someone he is being intimate with is actually giving something back that she cherishes. However, if you gave it out to every Malik that strolled the yard, do you know what that does for my psyche! It’s like when you buy the brand new iphone only to find out it dropped in price a week later. I gave up my special gift in return for the local special! It’s not an even exchange.

    A girl’s saving grace: what if she was Cameron Diaz in a 1998 Farrelly Bros film and all the men she had relations with actually loved her besides the fact that they were many (including Bret Favre). Shouldn’t she get credit for only spreading her legs to the deserving? In my previously life as a shoe salesman (a rough patch in my existence) I came up with the Whore Coefficient, copyrighted 2003 all rights reserved. If you take the number of men you slept with and minus the number of serious boyfriends that you have had, than divide that number by the amount of years since you have lost your virginity. Best case scenario, even a girl who has experience the pleasure of DP can have a Zero!

    I can’t kiss another man’s semen rag,
    CHeeKZ “No sig names, my momma named me CHeeKZ” Money

  35. CHeeKZ has been nominated for the funniest blog comment award. The winner receives a small trophy and a bag of trees….

    Just kidding.

  36. RightCoastLexSteele

    I was unaware of this particular contest…I’m in! Keep the trophy and double the latter…

    As I begin pt. 3 of my devil’s advocacy, I wonder, what exactly is considered a jump. I’m not being coy or naive, but seriously define a jump off. I’m sure everyone has a different definition what a JO is. But for the record are we looking at past behavior or current tendencies? There is definitely a difference between the two. I think there is a difference between the young lady who let 20 dudes slide over the course of 5 years and hasnt had sex since Ja Rule was hot and the chick who just changes dudes as often as her drawers. The latter is probably not wifey material (unless her name is Superhead or Vida Guerra, then I dont care) but are we really going to frown on shorty for her 20?

    “When things start to get serious for a couple that is when they start sharing things that are exclusive. My penis isn’t exclusive or unique to a girl I have feelings for in anyway. It has been shared by nice girls, sluts, Asians, hood rats, church girls, fat ones, strippers, and some girls who I was suspicious of being burnt (but I beat anyway and just kept my boxers on for extra protection). Sex isn’t what is special for a man to only share with a girl he wants to build with. His feelings and reputation are distinctive to a relationship. I guy wants to know that someone he is being intimate with is actually giving something back that she cherishes. However, if you gave it out to every Malik that strolled the yard, do you know what that does for my psyche!”

    Ok. This is problematic to me for a few different reasons. I’ll concede that we live in a society of double standards where men can slay as many dragons as they like. But let’s face an honest fact for a quick second. If you expect a low number from shorty, why shouldnt expect the same of her partner? Ok, a man’s penis isnt exclusive to a woman he loves, but her vag is supposed to be to him? I’m missing the part where she should be content to get the dick that has been shared by sluts, hood rats, strippers and fat chicks but her shit needs to be untouched or slightly used. Sounds alot like “f*ck you, pay me”. I wont throw my number out there, but I can say that I’d probably need an abacus once I ran out of fingers and toes. It would behoove me to frown on a chick that told me she slept with 10 dudes. We dont live in the 50’s. I’m not saying turn into Captain Save a Ho, but you must look at past behavior and current tendencies/intent in two different lights. And dont throw stones out of your glass palace. If you go around trying to not to wife up a ho…guess what, you will anyway. Come on now…most dudes dont want a virgin, but they dont want a ho. Next time you have a party in Utopia, please invite me. The drugs there are probably great! You might as well start hunting virgins, because by this logic they are someone else’s nut rag. Think about it…if she’s only ever slept with two dudes but she likes to “traga me” (look it up, it’s espanol), she didnt wake up the day she met you and realized that. She was practicing with 1 and 2. And now you are 3. Kissing her all in the mouth. But it’s cool cuz she only did it to two other dudes. Right………………………………..

  37. RightCoastLexSteele

    Oh yea, Maliks are whack and if she messed with Malik’s she whack. If I’ve offended any Malik’s…too bad.

  38. That’s why I don’t ask about the numbers unless I’m reallly intrigued. If she got pumped down by 15 dudes during college and only 1 in the 2-3 years that she’s been out, that’s supposed to be acceptable? So if Superhead became a born again virgin despite her filming with Mr. Marcus, I’m supposed to let that rock because that was a long time ago? As I said in a previous comment, Get The F*ck Outta Here!


  39. LOL – these responses answer the question of why women have to lie! Look at what yall have said…from jump off, to superhead! Y’all ask for the truth and then say dont take it personal its just my preference. So I guess the girl who was a little loose in her youth either has to lie or has to be alone because the truth will run any man away….

  40. RightCoastLexSteele

    LMAO…if you saw the filming you should definitely let it rock because GODDAMN!! It was SUPER! But yeah, I’d let 16 in 8 years rock. That’s two dudes a year avg. I’ve had a 2 chicks in a day episode, who I am to judge. (God Bless colleges and universities.) Would it make a difference if they were all boyfriends and not random slides?

    FYI Insomnia, Superhead is a person not a random term for a loose girl. (Superhead however is a loose girl. Google Karrine Steffans. Preferably not at work.)

    I’ll get the f*ck out as soon as I get my twenty twen twen…to hell with the contest, just run that prize, son!

  41. #1) we all know dudes who done wifed the neighborhood shmeez – we laugh behind his back but we still hang out with him

    #2) thats y i dont be kissin no jawns in the mouth, unless i really like em, and it damn sure wont happen the first time i meet u (see my pose a few days ago about wht folk kissin jawns in the mouth)

    #3) for me, i’m less concerned with a number and more concerned with how many of them dudes i know. i have a policy. if me and my former JO now SO was to get married and we could invite 100 or so ppl each, would i mistakenly invite one of ur old jumps?

    #4) i like the formula with all the subtraction and division

  42. Just to add another comment, a high number does not make a hoe, and a low number does not make a ‘wifey’ either.

    I know a girl that could count the number of partners she had on one hand. However, she slept with my sands (fellow fraternity brother whom crossed the same semester as I), my dean, and me within the span of a few months. She knew we all ere well acquainted with one another. and she still went through us as if it were some kind of rotation. We all had more than one ‘turn’ with her.

    She basically passed herself around between us.

    Some might attribute this act to bad judgment, but if she knew it was wrong, and/or had reservations about sleeping with us (knowing whom she had been with prior), how much benefit of the doubt does she deserve?

    I know that I would personally have more respect for the woman with 20 partners (than a woman such as herself), and never once put herself in such a ‘slutty situation’. There is a difference between being acting whorish and being liberal.

  43. I have to agree with RightCoast and JR. Not because I have high #’s or an sticking up for “hoes” or any of that. I feel that there are SO MANY different scenario’s to how people sleep with one another and it should be judged based on relationship experience (ie: serious relationship, talking w/ a dude for awhile, or random one night stands, runnin through a group of friends)…all of the scenarios a girl could sleep w/ a guy and the judgement attached is entirely different.

    RightCoast & JR…I think it’s great that you two recognize not to judge the ladies with high #’s.

    All in all I think a # doesn’t give you much to judge – it’s the situations around the #’s as JR pointed out

  44. WithRainbowSprinkles

    Listen, jumps need love too! If you’re judging a girl based on her numbers then you need to get a life and find something else to do.I suppose everyone is entitled to their own opinions and preferences but know that there all sorts of reasons a girl’s numbers could be high or low and I’d beware either way.

  45. Sowhatiff Jenkins

    First, I must say I LOVE the dialog…the comments are great! Now on with it.

    All this “I’ll date a chic that slept with this number of dudes, but not more than this…”, and admitting to the double standard…I must say that most of you men proved my point. And the formula?? That only applies to women huh? If women applied that same formula…we’d be SOL.

  46. *sigh*…I know I’m so late, however, I am probably the only one commenting on this particular blog who really can’t relate to the debate of any number whatsoever. By the way, I wasn’t trying to rhyme. Up until this past summer when I actually started to date people, I thought it was considered profoudly exceptional to have a number less than 1, however, I am quickly finding out that many guys (sleazebags) want to take advantage of one who is “un-broken in” and unburdened by emotional baggage from past relationships. They are overjoyed to think (dream) that they could have a shot at being el numero uno without any red tape. Seems like many revert back to sophomore/jr. year of high school way of reasoning. They think “Hey this girl is so brand-new; she mustn’t know jack diddley! I could pull any garbage on her and she will be completely sprung. I got this chick, main.” I don’t know if it’s just me…I take that back it’s not me…it’s them, they assume by the time a woman is my age that she should have already racked up some numbers of serious relationships/bed buddies. It’s not like I put off an innocent vibe on purpose. I very conscientious/wary which is why I still am the way I am today. This one guy (dog pile) who I wasted my life on for about three weeks before he switched his mouth for his ass said that one of things that initially attracted him to me was my “innocent look.” From the start, we agreed we wanted to keep things totally platonic. A couple weeks later, when I refused to meet up with him at some random time/place at 1 am to “just chill” he cursed me out for “putting my **ss* on a pedestal.” Go figure? I thought he was attracted to my so-called innocence??? I thought he just wanted to be friends??? Other dudes don’t even want to try to act maturely after I tell them my number. What the double hock is the deal? It’s not like I’m going around blaring a horn about it; dudes ask the numbers (disguised as “how many boyfriends?”) question. When I answer honestly, they put two and two together, then they start acting like sophomoric neandrathals. I don’t even want to expound. I’m just really frustrated so early in the game. If this keeps up, I might just have to do the dude thing and increase my numbers (i.e. relationship experience lies), since imaginary numbers may garner more respect than negative numbers these hypersexualized days. YES! I blame the media, lol! Or I could just avoid the question like American tomatoes in June 2008, however, that will make it seem like I’m hiding a notorious freakazoid skeleton in the closet. Either way, I just don’t know yet. *sigh*

  47. RightCoastLexSteele

    uh…any particular reason to hold on to your V-Card this long? It doesnt appreciate in value over time…

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